I, Frankenstein? No, You Frankenstein!... Review!

Glib reviews of Recent DVD/Blu ray releases.

I, Frankenstein
- Directed By Stuart Beattie

I, Frankenstein is just as ridiculous as you imagine it might be, perhaps even more ridiculous. What works is that the pace is whiz bang. History, of the Monster and his creator Victor, a few minutes of narration and montage, and then, Bam we are into gargoyle half Angels and Demons slicing each other up and either ‘ascending’ (Gargoyles) or ‘Descending” each other to Heaven or Hell. Aaron Eckhardt plays the least physically scarred Frankenstein Monster of them all. He’s also of of your least sympathetic monsters; in fact, he’s mostly a self possessed dick.

Speaking of Possession, the best thing about the movie, other than very decent CGI Demon/Gargoyle fights is Bill Nighy’s furniture chomping Prince/CEO Niberius Demon Lord. Nighy carries Eames Chairs to pick his teeth with, in this rat-a-tat paced movie. There is a nice mad scientist Lady inadvertently working for the Demons, who has a teeny spark of chemistry with the Monster that the “Queen of The Gargoyles” has named Adam.

The only people really worth cheering for are the bad guys, sadly vaguely entertaining, but completely void of character development movie. Stand around in an Alley long enough and someone will leap off a rooftop wielding a really weird blade at you.

The setup at the end is waving maniacally for there to be a sequel. There is some fun material, but no heart (ironic? maybe) in this bazillionth version of Frankenstein’s Monster to appear on screen. Some of the ideas seem like they would be better played out slowly on a Tv show, like that new Penny Dreadful, as opposed to a bunch of clunky Sci-Fi action movies. Everyone in this movie seems to work and or live in a church or a converted cathedral. Atmosphere, occasional funny quip, sure, heart, soul, sure, just like the monster, not so much. Too bad, really, it looked pretty.




5.5687 Super Emo stick fighting Frankenstein Monsters wearing  hoodies, outta 10


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Nerd-Sploitation Weekend continues

Image
Glib Reviews of New Releases NerdFest Day 2 Continuing my Nerd-Sploitation festival with the almost traditional tale of of the out of control Game Master. Earlier examples of this sort of the tiny Nerdsploitation genre includes Gamers, (and it’s sequel) or any of those movies that I don't watch, that involve video games. Zero Charisma - Directed by Katie Graham , Andrew Matthews Is a surprising solid portrayal of the aging Nerd, or Fan. The main character is in many ways a painful reminder of what its like to be so obsessed with a game (or any fantasy) that it ruins the rest of your life.  Scott The GM in question ( Sam Eidson ), may in fact be a triggering presence for many gamers, or ex gamers. Be warned, the interplay of the players and GM struggling through a ridiculously overlong campaign is more realistic than the things the players do ‘in game.’ People being talked over, outside noise causing havoc with the flow of the game, the omnipresence of snack
Read more

Review of Tangerine!

Image
Glib Reviews Of Recent DVD Releases Tangerine - Directed By Sean Baker Tangerine is one of those films that ‘feels like’ it was shot chronologically. The first few scenes are a bit rough, the acting is a bit iffy, but as the characters of Sin-Dee and Alexandra walk endlessly through their drama filled Christmas Eve Day in L.A. The picture gets more gripping, the cinematography, the acting and the script all get better, more polished in a low budget way. The locations give a nice grimy seventies feel to the whole thing. Sin-Dee (Kitana Kiki Rodriguez) is especially unlikeable at the beginning of the film, her single mindedness in finding her pimp/boyfriend and the girl he ‘cheated on her’ with while she was doing a month in jail, is not terribly nuanced. The buffer of the her best friend Alexandra (Mya Taylor) trying to keep her from all the drama she is creating, while trying to hustle tickets for a show she is doing that night keeps the whole thing from being one note.
Read more

My middling review of "Night Moves" by Kelly Reichardt

Image
Glib reviews of recent DVD/Blu Ray releases. Night Moves - Directed by Kelly Reichardt This is not your father’s ‘Night Moves,’ that one is an under appreciated Arthur Penn flick with Gene Hackman. Both do crucially involve boats though. I wanted to like this film a bit more than I did. As a big fan of Reichardt’s films in general, I was looking forward to this quite a bit. It may be though my least favourite of the bunch, but that by no means says it’s a bad film, just not quite as good as the previous three films. If you like creepy atmospheric slow paced gorgeously shot in Oregon kind of movies, you will dig this. Jesse Eisenberg is at his broodingest best, here, you barely ever see under his hooded eyes, he only ever really expresses emotions over the things he perceives with horror, like the dead deer he moves from the edge of the highway to save the dead doe the dignity of not getting run over again and again, at least. The basic plot has Jesse (as Josh, commu
Read more